To those of you loyal and closely-related enough to check in every day, excuse my absence. That tummy bug dragged on and on, knocking me for six, making me feel nauseous and burpy and reducing my energy levels to that of a squashed gnat. So basically I have spent the last four days doing the strict minimum while all the rest went to pot as I kept collapsing in a small farty heap in my bed.
But I am back, if not on fighting form, at least stable enough to be able to focus on the screen and identify most of the letters on the keyboard.
The feedback on my last two weeks of entries has been that those of you readers who are British (or American) want more more MORE of the Frenglish spoken over here amongst the French in-crowd (language then filtered down to the not-so-in-crowd, the plebs and eventually, probably, into French dictionaries). It makes you titter and guffaw and no doubt feel slightly, or hugely, superior. So here are a few more examples of English words humbly adopted, and often squashed, by the French.
Tommy is into Toy Story at the moment and he even found himself a Toy Story book at the local supermarket last week. All the characters from the two films are in the book, but some have different names. Bullseye the horse is called “Pile-poil” which is quite a good translation, but Tommy shouts Bullseye! Bullseye! whenever he sees Bullseye, which led to his daddy asking what he was saying. So I translated and explained the meaning using darts as an example and Lorenzo said “Ah oui, bull-eyes”. “No, bullseye” I repeated, “Oui, bull-eyes” he replied and explained that that’s what the French shout when their dart hits the centre of the board. BULL-EYES!! And while I’m on the subject of games and sports, they also call the goalie on a football team ‘le goal’, thus confusing the person with the wooden, netted, rectangular structure the chaps kick balls into and possibly reducing the goalie’s self-esteeem to le zero.
I shall do some more research into the subject (this basically involves phoning up friends who work in culturally-swayed offices in Paris and Marseille and asking them to listen to le conversation around them for half an hour) and get back to you oh so soon. I realise my four day absence has probably traumatised a large number of you and for this I apologise humbly. And yes, in a way I have indeed broken my New Year’s resolution to write something EVERYday. But I don’t think it matters. Having written daily for over two weeks seems to have reprogrammed my brain and I think I’m hooked now. I might even do a double-whammy today. I might write something absolutely mind-blowing this evening and be spotted by the Guardian. BULL-EYES!